Met with our social worker this week.
Score is: Homestudy update 3 ... Referral 0
sigh. 'nuff said.
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Gift #7 Trust in God
I'm finally posting about the last chapter of the excellent book "Seven Spiritual Gifts of Waiting" (Whitcomb). Waiting helps us learn to trust in God. One idea in this section is making a container to serve as "God's In-box." Whatever you are worring about, just write it down and give it to God. It's a visual reminder that God cares and is at work in our situations.
She also talks about how we console ourselves with the thought that God's will be done in our situation. However, we seem to always have a negative view of this. She talks about how people always say "It must have been God's will" when tragic things happen. But we rarely say "It must have been God's will that I got that promotion at work." We need to remember that God is on our side. She quotes minister Wayne Muller who says we need to substitute "Thy love be done" in place of "Thy will be done."
God waits for us all the time to be in communication with Him. One of the easiest and best things we can do is "offer it up" to God through prayer.
Great book. I encourage you to read it for yourself. I think it will really speak to the spiritual person who is waiting and doesn't understand why they need to wait. Has it made the waiting easier? Not really. But, it has given the wait a stronger sense of purpose. I get the idea that God has some things he's teaching me throughout the waiting. Now the question is, am I learning my lessons?
My wise and wonderful 4 year old daughter said to me out of the blue a few days ago:
"Mommy, God is my best friend."
Mommy says (while choking on the bite of dinner I had just stuck in my mouth), "What did you say?"
"God is my best friend. We play together all the time. I can't see him yet, but he's my best friend. Why can't I see God again, Mommy?"
I go on to explain that God is way up high in heaven and even though we can't see him, he is always with us everywhere.
And even as I'm explaining this to her, I feel God explaining it to me. "Hey Big Girl, I'm with you too, ya know. Maybe you can't see me right this second in this situation, but I'm still there. Am I your best friend? Do you play/pray with me all the time?"
Oh, kids...they constantly teach us parents all about the important stuff in life, don't they? Here's wishing you a divine best friend while you wait!
She also talks about how we console ourselves with the thought that God's will be done in our situation. However, we seem to always have a negative view of this. She talks about how people always say "It must have been God's will" when tragic things happen. But we rarely say "It must have been God's will that I got that promotion at work." We need to remember that God is on our side. She quotes minister Wayne Muller who says we need to substitute "Thy love be done" in place of "Thy will be done."
God waits for us all the time to be in communication with Him. One of the easiest and best things we can do is "offer it up" to God through prayer.
Great book. I encourage you to read it for yourself. I think it will really speak to the spiritual person who is waiting and doesn't understand why they need to wait. Has it made the waiting easier? Not really. But, it has given the wait a stronger sense of purpose. I get the idea that God has some things he's teaching me throughout the waiting. Now the question is, am I learning my lessons?
My wise and wonderful 4 year old daughter said to me out of the blue a few days ago:
"Mommy, God is my best friend."
Mommy says (while choking on the bite of dinner I had just stuck in my mouth), "What did you say?"
"God is my best friend. We play together all the time. I can't see him yet, but he's my best friend. Why can't I see God again, Mommy?"
I go on to explain that God is way up high in heaven and even though we can't see him, he is always with us everywhere.
And even as I'm explaining this to her, I feel God explaining it to me. "Hey Big Girl, I'm with you too, ya know. Maybe you can't see me right this second in this situation, but I'm still there. Am I your best friend? Do you play/pray with me all the time?"
Oh, kids...they constantly teach us parents all about the important stuff in life, don't they? Here's wishing you a divine best friend while you wait!
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Waiting and Depression
Betcha think we are going to talk about the emotional side of waiting today? Nope, I'm referring to the next "Great Depression" the news media has been predicting these past few days. It's hard not to freak out if you watch too many news stories!
However, I think this long adoption wait has actually been good for us in relation to the economy. Since we know/hope that someday we will get a referral, we have been very hesitant to spend any money outside of necessities. We have been trying to save up for the adoption and the longer it takes, the more expensive it gets. Just shelled out another $550 to the home study agency for another update. I think I need to own a home study agency!
I feel like we have already gotten good at being frugal and knowing what's important and what isn't when it comes to material goods. Of course there are still a few things we could quickly remove from our budget if needed. (Cable, newspaper, preschool if we absolutely had to!).
On the flip side, I'm worried about my hubby's job (in a construction related industry--not a good place to be). Wouldn't it be our luck that just before referral, he'll lose his job.
That's my biggest worry about this whole financial mess: something will get in the way of our second adoption. All of this waiting and money spent and we'll end up without another child. I pray that doesn't happen. That's all I can do. We've done everything we can do from our end to prepare. It's up to the Big Guy now! I know His plan is better than mine, so we'll just have to wait and see.
...and clip some more coupons!
Is this financial crisis affecting your adoption? Leave me a comment!
However, I think this long adoption wait has actually been good for us in relation to the economy. Since we know/hope that someday we will get a referral, we have been very hesitant to spend any money outside of necessities. We have been trying to save up for the adoption and the longer it takes, the more expensive it gets. Just shelled out another $550 to the home study agency for another update. I think I need to own a home study agency!
I feel like we have already gotten good at being frugal and knowing what's important and what isn't when it comes to material goods. Of course there are still a few things we could quickly remove from our budget if needed. (Cable, newspaper, preschool if we absolutely had to!).
On the flip side, I'm worried about my hubby's job (in a construction related industry--not a good place to be). Wouldn't it be our luck that just before referral, he'll lose his job.
That's my biggest worry about this whole financial mess: something will get in the way of our second adoption. All of this waiting and money spent and we'll end up without another child. I pray that doesn't happen. That's all I can do. We've done everything we can do from our end to prepare. It's up to the Big Guy now! I know His plan is better than mine, so we'll just have to wait and see.
...and clip some more coupons!
Is this financial crisis affecting your adoption? Leave me a comment!
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Waiting for a waiting blog post?
If you've been waiting for a waiting blog post, you've been waiting awhile! Sorry, I just realized it's been forever since I wrote on here. I think about it, but I just never sit down and do it!
We still have the 7th gift from the "Seven Spiritual Gifts of Waiting" book to be discussed, but that can wait until next time. Today's post is just gibberish, I think!
We did take our house off the market, so that is actually a big relief for the moment. We're getting ready to update paperwork for the adoption again. How many times we will have to do that is anyone's guess! Our daughter is back in preschool for her last year and I'm suddenly realizing how big she is! Less than a year until kindergarten. We should make more crafts, we should read more books, we should watch less TV, etc. I'm having a little Mommy freak out. Where did all that time go and did I spend it wisely? I'm so lucky to be home, but sometimes I let the housework and every day stuff take up the whole day and I don't just sit down and enjoy my kid like I used to.
We were watching video from when she first came home. She was so different. Take my advice...make sure you videotape! You won't remember what they were like. The pictures help, but the videos are so great to watch. My daughter thinks watching videos of herself is so much fun!
Fall is my favorite season. I love this time of year and it always seems to be so busy. From now until New Year's, time will fly by. That makes the waiting a bit easier, I guess. How are my fellow waiters doing? Thanks for reading and I will try to post more faithfully!
We still have the 7th gift from the "Seven Spiritual Gifts of Waiting" book to be discussed, but that can wait until next time. Today's post is just gibberish, I think!
We did take our house off the market, so that is actually a big relief for the moment. We're getting ready to update paperwork for the adoption again. How many times we will have to do that is anyone's guess! Our daughter is back in preschool for her last year and I'm suddenly realizing how big she is! Less than a year until kindergarten. We should make more crafts, we should read more books, we should watch less TV, etc. I'm having a little Mommy freak out. Where did all that time go and did I spend it wisely? I'm so lucky to be home, but sometimes I let the housework and every day stuff take up the whole day and I don't just sit down and enjoy my kid like I used to.
We were watching video from when she first came home. She was so different. Take my advice...make sure you videotape! You won't remember what they were like. The pictures help, but the videos are so great to watch. My daughter thinks watching videos of herself is so much fun!
Fall is my favorite season. I love this time of year and it always seems to be so busy. From now until New Year's, time will fly by. That makes the waiting a bit easier, I guess. How are my fellow waiters doing? Thanks for reading and I will try to post more faithfully!
Thursday, September 4, 2008
Found a Flower
My blog tag line says that I'm stuck in the weeds of waiting, but looking for the flowers. The photo is one of the morning glories that greet me every morning in my back yard. The past 4 months, we have been trying to sell our house. We almost did last weekend, and the buyer backed out. I think that was a blessing. We've realized that selling isn't a bad idea, but it is not the wisest decision for us right now. So, instead of focusing on all the things we dislike about our house and neighborhood, we are focusing on all the things we like. The "for sale" sign is coming down.
Funny how when you zoom in on the good stuff in your life, your attitude is cheerful and calm. On the flip side, when you think about all that isn't perfect, all the stuff you don't have, all the things that could go wrong, your attiude and stress level suffer. It's hard to remember how lucky we are, isn't it? Am I the only one who constantly struggles in this area? What are you zooming in on in your life these days? Are your thoughts full of good stuff or stress?
I'm gonna go smell the flowers...our flowers in our yard at our house. Happy Thursday!
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Gift #6: Humility
Back to the great book, "Seven Spiritual Gifts of Waiting" by Holly Whitcomb. The sixth gift of waiting is humility. She opens this chapter with "sometimes we wait because we can't do anything else. We recognize we are powerless". We learn to lean on God during this time and experience grace because we can't "do" anything about our situation.
Once we stop trying to "do" something, we may have more time to see who we actually are and evaluate what is important to us. We see that the times we have "done" something are not as important as the times that we have loved someone. The author says that the despair of waiting can bring us low...and that change in perspective helps us see others around us who are struggling, too. We learn to value people more and honor the human journey more.
She ends with the thought that humility allows us to see our weaknesses and our flaws. But, it also allows us to see our strengths and our potential. As we wait, we need to acknowledge what good things the wait brings out of us as well as work on the not-so-good qualities we see in ourselves.
It makes me feel like while waiting, God hands you a great big mirror like the kind you find in dressing rooms. The lighting brings out all your flaws and wrinkles. What do you see in there? Do you still have a happy glow about you or is it all slumped shoulders and frowns? Do you look for the good qualities or only the bad? What can we learn from this mirror?
Here's looking at you, fellow waiters! Hope you see lots of good stuff in your mirrors!
Once we stop trying to "do" something, we may have more time to see who we actually are and evaluate what is important to us. We see that the times we have "done" something are not as important as the times that we have loved someone. The author says that the despair of waiting can bring us low...and that change in perspective helps us see others around us who are struggling, too. We learn to value people more and honor the human journey more.
She ends with the thought that humility allows us to see our weaknesses and our flaws. But, it also allows us to see our strengths and our potential. As we wait, we need to acknowledge what good things the wait brings out of us as well as work on the not-so-good qualities we see in ourselves.
It makes me feel like while waiting, God hands you a great big mirror like the kind you find in dressing rooms. The lighting brings out all your flaws and wrinkles. What do you see in there? Do you still have a happy glow about you or is it all slumped shoulders and frowns? Do you look for the good qualities or only the bad? What can we learn from this mirror?
Here's looking at you, fellow waiters! Hope you see lots of good stuff in your mirrors!
Monday, August 18, 2008
Birthday Blessings
Didn't get a chance to post last week. We've got our house for sale and have had some stuff going on with that. We also packed up Friday and went on a camping trip to the mountains. That was very refreshing!
Today is my birthday and I'm counting my blessings. Between the house and the adoption, my world is full of unknowns and anxiety. I constantly remind myself that I am waiting for all good things to happen. I have my faith, good health, a terrific hubby, sweet daughter and lots of family and friends. We have a nice house, two reliable vehicles, lots of "stuff" and lots of fun. All the worries, though major life changing things, are small potatoes compared to what many families deal with every day. I am blessed.
So, if you need me, I will be sitting in my unsold house, with a big smile on my face holding a big spoon above an even bigger piece of ice cream cake! Happy Monday!
Today is my birthday and I'm counting my blessings. Between the house and the adoption, my world is full of unknowns and anxiety. I constantly remind myself that I am waiting for all good things to happen. I have my faith, good health, a terrific hubby, sweet daughter and lots of family and friends. We have a nice house, two reliable vehicles, lots of "stuff" and lots of fun. All the worries, though major life changing things, are small potatoes compared to what many families deal with every day. I am blessed.
So, if you need me, I will be sitting in my unsold house, with a big smile on my face holding a big spoon above an even bigger piece of ice cream cake! Happy Monday!
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